Finding the Right Mentor

Assalamu ‘alaykum wa rahmat Allahi wa barakatuh 

Last week, we reflected on how the busyness of life often leads us to neglect our spiritual growth and the importance of making our spiritual practices non-negotiable parts of our day. We also highlighted the value of seeking guidance from a mentor.

But how do we know if our mentor is truly qualified to guide us? How do we ensure that the path we’re on is the right one? Without proper guidance, we risk mistaking fleeting emotions or temporary experiences for true spiritual insight. 

One of the key signs of a true shaykh is their deep knowledge of the soul’s virtues and vices. They understand the nuances of spiritual ailments and provide personalised guidance tailored to our specific struggles. This wisdom, combined with discernment, helps us navigate the complexities of spiritual experiences and avoid common pitfalls. 

For instance, many people mistakenly believe that a true shaykh must exhibit extraordinary feats, such as karamat (miracles) or kashf (unveilings). However, the true measure of a shaykh does not lie in these outward displays, but in their ability to help purify hearts, impart wisdom, and guide seekers toward genuine spiritual growth.

To assist you in identifying such a guide, I’m sharing below 10 key signs of a qualified shaykh from the translation of Shaykh Masihullah Khan’s ‘Essentials of Islamic Spirituality’:

1. He should possess the necessary knowledge of the religion, which he must have acquired either by formal pursuit of such knowledge or from remaining in the company of firmly grounded scholars.

2. He must be a deputy (khalifa) of a qualified shaykh and attached to a legitimate order (silsila).

3. He should be upright and pious, refraining from major sins and from continuously committing minor sins.

4. He must have derived spiritual benefit by remaining in the company of his shaykh for an adequate period of time. Such “companionship” can either come through physically being in the shaykh’s presence or through correspondence.

5. The people of knowledge (‘ulama) and understanding hold him in high esteem and resort to him [in matters].

6. His companionship increases one’ desires for the Hereafter and divine love, and decreases one's love for the world.

7. The majority of his disciples are followers of the Shari’a.

8. He is without greed and desire [for worldly gain and benefit].

9. He engages in remembrance and devotional practices.

10. He does not leave his disciples unfettered but reprimands them when the need arises, and treats everyone in accordance with respective abilities.

May Allah guide us to those who can truly illuminate our path and fill our hearts with sincerity and commitment to seeking His pleasure .

Wassalam,
Munibah